Couples Journaling Is Everywhere Right Now: What It Is, How to Do It, and Why Everyone's Trying It

Because sometimes the best conversations happen on paper first

If you're chronically online like we are, you've probably seen the prompts: "what made you fall for me?" or "describe our relationship in three words." Or maybe you've noticed couples praising this one habit that's apparently changed everything. Enter: couples journaling. The concept is simple, both partners answer the same prompt, then share what they wrote. But the appeal? It's a low-pressure way to check in, get curious about each other, and maybe uncover stuff you didn't even realize you weren't saying out loud. Think of it as intentional conversation without needing to schedule a whole State of the Union talk. So here's everything you need to know about the trend that's got everyone reaching for a notebook.

New York Momento
Photography: Esther Canon

What Is Couples Journaling?

At its core, couples journaling is exactly what it sounds like: you and your partner both respond to the same prompt, then share what you wrote. But it's not just one thing. Some couples use it for lighthearted check-ins, daily gratitudes, favorite memories, random "would you rather" questions that spark conversation over nothing in particular. Others go deeper, using prompts to work through harder conversations like expectations, boundaries, or things they've been avoiding saying out loud. It can be playful or serious, a way to stay connected during busy seasons or a tool to rebuild communication when things feel off. The point is, it's flexible. You're not locked into one version of it. Some couples use a shared notebook, passing it back and forth. Others keep separate journals and compare answers later. There are apps, beautifully bound pre-made prompt journals, or you can simply pull questions off Pinterest those evenings when you're both too tired to pick a show. The format matters way less than showing up for it consistently.

Photography: Marano Divaio
Özelle Atelier

Why Are People Doing It?

Because talking can be hard, actually! Not the surface-level stuff, you can probably tell your partner about your day or debate where to order dinner just fine. But the deeper check-ins? The "how are we actually doing?" conversations? Those tend to get shoved aside until something's already wrong. Couples journaling gives you a structure to have those conversations before they become conversations you have to have. Plus, writing things down first takes some of the pressure off. You get to organize your thoughts instead of just word-vomiting in the moment, and your partner gets to actually process what you're saying instead of immediately getting defensive. It's also just... kind of nice? When's the last time you asked your partner something you didn't already know the answer to?

Photography: Garrett Naccarato
Papir by Hannah

How to Actually Do It

There are a lot of ways to make this work, and honestly, the way you do it matters way less than just picking one and sticking with it. Some couples go the classic route: a shared notebook that lives on the nightstand, passed back and forth after each entry. Others prefer keeping separate journals and comparing answers side by side. If you're not into the whole analog thing, there are apps designed specifically for couples journaling, or you can just use the notes app on your phone. Handwritten letters work too, same concept, different vibe. The point is, it doesn't have to look a certain way. Figure out what feels natural for you two, because the second it starts feeling like a chore, you're not going to keep doing it.

Smythson, Content: Lucy Mahon
Photography: Anissad Photography

Tips to Get Started

First things first: make sure you're both actually into this. If one person is dragging the other along, it's going to fizzle out fast. Once you're on the same page, pick a time that actually works, Sunday mornings with coffee, before bed a couple nights a week, whatever feels doable. Start with easy prompts if you're feeling weird about it. "What's something that made you happy this week?" or "What's one thing I did recently that you appreciated?" You're not trying to unlock deep trauma on day one, just a conversation that will help you go deeper and understand each other a little better.

Content: Marley Luna
Photography: Esther Canon

Tips for Making It Work

Keep your answers short at first - five minutes max. You can always go deeper later, but if it feels like homework from the jump, you're both going to bail. And here's the thing: you don't have to discuss every answer to death. Sometimes it's enough to just read what your partner wrote, let it sit, and move on. Not everything needs a follow-up conversation. The act of writing and sharing is doing the work. Also, it's important to not judge each other's answers. The whole point is honesty, so if your partner shares something that surprises you, resist the urge to get defensive or critical. Instead, stay curious. Approach your partner's answers with genuine interest rather than looking for problems to solve. And celebrate the small wins—notice when your partner remembered something you mentioned or when an answer makes you feel seen. Those little moments are the whole point.

Photography: Miles Leav
Papier

Prompts to Get You Started

If you're staring at a blank page wondering where to even begin, here are some prompts to kick things off. Start with the easy ones and work your way up to the deeper stuff as you get more comfortable.