The first look: the ultimate wedding day debate. Some see it as a sweet pre-ceremony moment, while others view it as a break from tradition. Does it add an intimate touch or take away the magic of that first aisle glance? Whether you’re team 'First Look Forever' or 'Save It for the Aisle,' there’s no wrong choice. Let’s weigh the pros and cons of this modern tradition to help you decide what feels right for your day.
Emily Woodruff Photo, Bailee Merry
The Pros: Why You Might Say Yes to a First Look
A Private Moment to Savor
Think of a first look as your personal oasis before the wedding whirlwind begins. It’s a chance to soak in each other’s presence without that random relative snapping candids from the second row. It’s intimate, emotional, and completely yours. This quiet interlude allows you both to express your feelings and reactions to seeing each other all dressed up for the first time, creating a memory that's just as significant as the ceremony itself. In these precious minutes, you can share whispers, laughter, or even tears of happiness, away from the eyes of all your guests.
Tame the Pre-Ceremony Nerves
Got butterflies doing cartwheels in your stomach? Seeing your partner beforehand can calm those pre-ceremony jitters faster than a glass of champagne. A first look lets you start the day feeling connected and grounded, easing the emotional intensity often felt just before the ceremony. It's a chance to remind each other of the journey that brought you here and set a tone of tranquility and assurance that permeates the rest of your special day. This private meeting can be a deep breath for both of you, setting the stage for a ceremony filled with even more love and confidence.
Haute Weddings, Kayleigh Taylor
Picture-Perfect Timing
Golden hour lighting, no guests tugging you toward the bar, and plenty of time to get the perfect shot of your partner wiping away a single tear (or maybe both eyes streaming—it’s a big day!). A first look gives you the flexibility to capture stunning portraits without racing against the clock. Plus, it's a wonderful opportunity to enjoy a quiet, intimate moment together before the whirlwind begins. With photos already checked off before you say “I do,” you’ll have more time post-ceremony to sip on signature cocktails, hug your grandmother, or tear up the dance floor. Efficiency, but make it romantic.
Fresh-Faced Fabulousness
Your hair’s still perfectly coiffed, your makeup untouched by happy tears, and your attire is pristine. First look photos mean your glam squad’s efforts are immortalized at their absolute peak, capturing the essence of your carefully curated look before the day's festivities begin. This moment is perfect for preserving the freshness of your wedding ensemble in photographs, documenting the anticipation and joy with every detail—from the delicate fabric of your attire to the subtle shimmer of your eye shadow—showcased in its most flattering light.
The Cons: Why Tradition Might Trump Trend
Breaking with Tradition
If you’re a sucker for classic customs, the idea of a first look might feel like swapping a tiered wedding cake for cupcakes—perfectly valid, but not quite the same. For some, the drama of waiting for the ceremony to see each other is part of the magic. Bypassing this tradition could feel like missing out on a quintessential wedding moment that many dream of, leaving a sense of loss for the expected emotional buildup at the altar.
Diminished Anticipation
There’s something undeniably special about the moment your partner spots you walking down the aisle. For some couples, waiting until the ceremony to lock eyes is worth the extra suspense. This anticipation not only heightens emotions but also sets a dramatic tone for the ceremony, enhancing the significance of the moment when you finally see each other.
Timeline Challenges
Planning a first look can add an extra layer of logistical puzzle-solving to your day. Between hair, makeup, and wrangling your wedding party, a tight schedule—or unexpected weather—can make things tricky. This added complexity requires precise timing and can stress both the couple and the coordinators, potentially affecting the smooth flow of the day's events.
Guest FOMO
Let’s be honest—your guests are here for the feels. For some, witnessing the raw emotion of your first glimpse of each other is the ultimate ceremony highlight. Doing a first look might dilute that shared moment, and could leave guests feeling like they've missed out on witnessing that spontaneous joy and surprise that naturally occurs when you see each other at the start of the ceremony. However at the end of the day, the decision is deeply personal and should reflect what feels most meaningful for you as a couple.
